Monday, May 19, 2008

deathandregret

They approach with tears and longing,
Regret is forever a part of this for us.
We speak only when not taciturn.

Trying to graft sense to it...
Logic eludes me like the understanding the universe
I cannot change; I cannot explain.
You'd know.

Hushed mutterings of joy of life and tragic death and 'at peace' and 'no pain'
He-did-not-suffer they say and I say shut-up:
I feel bittersweet regret, they did not know like I do
Some are medicated; and perhaps I am too.

Yellow glints from the ground - a tribute, however useless.
The magnolia shining as the grass grows with you as it's sustenance
Peace is that nature in which you live.
I hate thinking you might be happy there.

We continue on, staving off the insidious anger day by day.
There is no hurt such as this dullness, numbness...
Deafness to this life.
But madness rests in the next room.

No one can help me understand this.
Nothing anyone says is right.
They all knowingly say that this is inevitable.
Not you to me, never

And I hate that I only cry for so long
For you and me...we know it's the way of things.
I despise life passing as if you were never here,
Pretending you never gifted my life to me.

So many empty spaces now
Adaptation is a forced habit
I struggle to catch my breath of regret
And I am helpless against this.